Surviving Remote Work
I have been a developer for almost 20 years. During that time I've wandered through countless office environments—from sterile corporate skyscrapers to chaotic startup lofts. I've navigated cubicle labyrinths that would make Daedalus proud and fought for "hot-desks" like they were the last lifeboat on a sinking ship. But starting in December 2019, I began a new chapter—100% remote work. Not by choice, but by necessity. And sometimes, the most profound changes in our lives come from circumstances we never anticipated.
How it all changed
Life has a way of rewriting your plans when you least expect it. My son was diagnosed with a rare birth disorder called Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia (CDH). If you're not familiar with CDH, it occurs in about 1 in 2,500 births and affects the development of the diaphragm during pregnancy. The survival rate typically hovers around 50%, but is strongly linked to the experience of the care team.
So we made the decision that many parents in our situation face—putting everything else second. We chose to relocate 3,000 miles away from our home, family, and friends in order to be treated by the best hospital and doctors in the world for CDH. A cross-country move isn't just about distance; it's about uprooting your entire life and replanting it in unfamiliar soil, hoping it will somehow take root.
The great remote experiment begins
Remote work was becoming increasingly common even before the pandemic forced it on millions, but my situation was different. I wasn't choosing remote work as a lifestyle preference or career move—I was embracing it out of necessity. With a backdrop of medical appointments, hospital stays, and the constant hum of anxiety that comes with having a child with serious medical needs.
My employer was incredibly understanding. When faced with the choice between losing a valuable team member or experimenting with remote work arrangements, they opted for the latter. I was grateful, but also nervous. Could I really maintain the same level of productivity and engagement while dealing with such personal challenges?
The first lessons learned
Those first few weeks taught me more about remote work than any article or book ever could. Here are some initial observations that might help anyone suddenly thrust into remote work:
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Your workspace matters more than you think. When your home becomes your office, the boundaries between work and personal life can blur dangerously. I quickly learned that I needed a dedicated space—even if it was just a corner of a room—that signaled "this is where work happens."
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Communication needs to be intentional. In an office, you pick up countless contextual clues from casual conversations. Remotely, everything needs to be explicit. I found myself over-communicating at first, which was actually better than the alternative.
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Isolation happens faster than you expect. The social aspect of work isn't just about water cooler gossip—it's about feeling connected to something larger than yourself. This hit me particularly hard because I was already feeling isolated due to being in a new city.
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Technology becomes your lifeline. A reliable internet connection, good headphones, and proper video conferencing setup aren't luxuries—they're necessities. I learned this the hard way when my first important virtual meeting was plagued by technical issues.
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Mental health requires active management. The combination of work stress, personal challenges, and isolation can create a perfect storm for mental health struggles. Finding ways to decompress became not just important but essential.
"Remote work isn't just a change of scenery—it's a change of mindset. The sooner you embrace that, the sooner you'll thrive."
Finding balance amid chaos
Balancing work responsibilities with hospital visits and the emotional roller coaster of having a child with medical needs taught me something crucial about remote work: flexibility is both its greatest strength and its greatest challenge.
The flexibility to work from anywhere meant I could be present for important medical appointments. But it also meant that work could creep into every corner of my life if I wasn't careful. Creating boundaries became my most important task—not just physical boundaries of workspace, but temporal boundaries of when work happens and when it doesn't.
I started setting alarms to remind myself to end the workday, something I never needed in an office environment where everyone packing up served as a natural cue. I also began to be more intentional about transitions between "work mode" and "home mode," even if that transition was just walking around the block or doing a quick meditation.
What's Next
Over the next few articles, I'll be detailing the things that I am learning about full-time remote work, and how to survive a brand-new kind of distraction. From establishing routines that keep you sane to managing relationships with colleagues you rarely see in person, we'll explore the unique challenges and unexpected benefits of working remotely.
In Part 2, we'll dive into the importance of establishing a daily routine when your commute is just a few steps from your bedroom to your workspace. How do you create structure when the external frameworks of office life disappear? How do you maintain productivity when Netflix is just a click away?
Stay tuned—this is just the beginning of the journey.
